#twilighttuesday 2K13

So last year, my best friend and I coined the term 'Twilight Tuesday' (and no, it has nothing to do with the teenie bopper vamp movie/books...as in 'Twilight Zone') because randomly all of the craziest things seemed to happen to both of us on a series of Tuesdays throughout the year.  It ranged from bizarre twists that happened at work or just some out of the ordinary things that would happen with our fam and friends, but then the term ended up applying to our relationships.  For me, it obviously tied back a number of times to those pesky Boomerang Boys that I talk so much about.

One example of a specific Twilight Tuesday happened last summer.  I had been dating this guy, we'll call him Basketball Ted -- giant dude, 6'7, obviously used to play basketball in college, and now worked in the Financial District.  We had gone on like 3 dates and had been talking non-stop via message every day, and this particular Tuesday we had plans to go on a date.  And of course, I did not hear from him at all that day so he obviously was ditching my ass (spoiler alert, he eventually became a Boomerang Boy earlier this year).  So then, my bestie being as awesome as she is, came to my rescue and we went out to a patio together.  Well, we had the most random and fun night -- turning lemons into lemonade, baby!  We saw some NHLers on the patio, had some fruity beverages, and then out of NOWHERE this guy that I had dated  before my #Kryptonite ex messaged me.  Doctor Dave was this super cool guy who lived close to me and we got along super well, but because of timing (he was a resident at the time) our schedules never matched and we didn't really get to go out all that often.  In fact, he'd randomly call me from the on-call room at like 2 AM, but after a while that's not as much fun as actually seeing the dude.  So anyway, does he not call me and then we catch up for like an hour on the phone!? So interesting.  All because of this random #TwilightTuesday.

 Well ladies & gents, today is another of those Tuesdays.  Goalie Boy is this guy that I had dated at the beginning of the year - in fact we spent New Year's Day together - and we really had such amazing chemistry.  He took me on a super romantic date to Second City and I had a teenage moment with him, totally making out on the DWA at Bloor Station. (Seriously, who does that??) Anyway, after a while things fizzled with him as well, and we would keep messaging back and forth, but nothing ever really came of out.  Cut to the past couple of days, where he's been messaging me randomly.  And not the creepy, 'let's hook up!' type of messages, but actual conversations back and forth. Totally unexpected.  Well, so we do a little textual flirting back and forth:  basically he calls me sexy and I tell him that he's totes hot, and obviously he knows it.  He replies, 'Thank you, that puts a huge smile on my face' and I go, 'haha, whatever you know you're a babe!' and he goes 'well I know I'm not hideous, but I've never been called that before'...um, wha???  So then I go 'well, you are. so embrace it!' and he goes 'how am I a babe, Mel?' and then asks me after that 'Anything I need to improve?'

Ok. What?  Like I said. #TwilightTuesday

Frustration station #argh

So, this past weekend I had another boomerang situation.  And honestly, I am getting a little tired of it -- it is SO frustrating.  Why do guys always decide randomly out of nowhere that it's cool to come back to stir shit up?  Guaranteed if I EVER did that to any of exes, I'd totally be written off as crazy, but for them it's just no big deal -- how completely selfish of them!

Let me backtrack.  Last year I had dated...well let me put it in quotes, 'dated'...this guy who I thought 100% was the most intriguing, gorgeous, interesting, intense person ever.  He had a really interesting life story, played college bball and was unbelievably sexy (heyyy, tattoos).  I can't even create a name for him because he was so many random things, it's hard to classify! Well, little did I know that he had also dated a friend of a friend a few years back, and had been a total jerk to her - not just then, but a few years later after they'd been broken up for years.  So, of course my lovely friend warned me about his douchery, but also let me figure out for myself what I needed to.  Well, like a zebra doesn't change his stripes, a dbag doesn't lose his douchery even after a few years.  Anyway, after a roller coaster of emotions and total 'non-dating' for almost 6 months -- seriously, so much drama I couldn't even handle it -- it eventually just fizzled.  Last October, I ran into him randomly at Yonge-Dundas Square legit crossing the street, we gave each other the  head nod and kept walking -- and that was the last time I'd seen him.  He deleted me from Facebook as well.

So out of nowhere he messages me this weekend to say 'hey, we lost touch. say hello sometime.'

ARGH.

Intrigued I message back and we do the little banter dance back and forth.  Then I finally get the real reason he was messaging...oh yeah, how obvious is this.  He wanted to know if I'd be down for a 'cuddle and a catch up'...very polite way of saying a hook-up, but the same sentiment nonetheless.

NO I DO NOT WANT TO CUDDLE AND CATCH UP.

GO CUDDLE YOURSELF.

ARGH.

The end.

ARGH.

No thanks. Buh bye.

So it turns out Military guy's only reason for messaging me last night was for a booty call.   No, sorry, I would not like 'for a visit from a guy in uniform' at midnight on a Wednesday.  Thanks, I'm good.

Seriously??

How do you go from someone who seems like the most unassuming and tamest of men to a giant doucher?  Well, obviously I was very easily fooled, and he was clearly a jerk all along.  And here I was thinking I had matured by not going for someone solely due to matching my 'type' or swooning over muscles and tattoos.  Dudes are going to be douchers undercover no matter how you package them up!

I will say that I'm so glad I got the last word and got to reject his requests.  My last message was just "NO".  What a dirt bag.  No thank you. #buhbye.

#kryptonite

Ok, so y'all know that I have a history of boys repeating on me. You know the type, those Boomerang Boys who come back out of nowhere when you least expect it and disrupt your lives, mess with your head and just make you crazy.  UGH. So frustrating.  Frustrating because I just want to say "LEAVE ME ALONE" and "GET THE HELL AWAY!" but then it becomes the vicious cycle, right? Like the minute you do say those things, that's when they take the communication to mean an open door to even MORE communication -- just when you really want them to actually go away and leave you alone.

Well, folks, last night my kryptonite came back out of the woodwork.  I had previously mentioned him in my first post on this blog again (first bullet point), so you guys get an idea of what he's like.  Comes back every few months when it is convenient for him, or when he has some issue that he thinks I will be able to fix, wreaking havoc and messing with my head.  Another vicious cycle that has been happening for the past 2 years. 2 years!!! 

A few weeks back, I just snapped when he messaged me out of the blue at 4 AM, oh yeah...after having come over to my place and calling me like 20 times.  So I finally just decided I needed  to do something, because obviously my completely ignoring him wasn't sinking in.  It was SO tough for me but I just wrote him this message essentially telling him that he was being completely inappropriate and how he treats me is so disrespectful and most of all selfish -- I am, afterall, NOT his girlfriend anymore. Get the hell away.  So after I had sent it, I felt this huge weight off my shoulders -- like a sigh of relief after holding my breath for the past 2 years.  But it was also a bit sad for me because he was a guy I had really been in love with, and I thought that this message would definitely signify the end of his contacting me.

Well, I guess I was freaing wrong about that.  Out of nowhere he messages me again last night.  This time, asking me for a 'fresh start'.  A chance again. UGH.

Like I said, he's my kryptonite.  I KNOW I should just either ignore it, or repeat the message I had so carefully worded last time around but perhaps with a 'FUCK OFF' thrown in for good measure.  BUT part of me is getting all melty inside...remembering all the reasons I fell in love with him to begin with, and clearly completely forgetting about all the crazy shit he put me through that broke us up.

WHAT THE HELL DO I DO?

SERIOUSLY.

HELP!

#boomerangboys

Everyone has one.  That ex that no matter how hard you try to shake 'em, they keep coming back. And coming back. Oh, and coming back.  One night over drinks we coined the term 'boomerang boys' to describe these guys...mostly because in my particular case, it's EVERY GUY that I have EVER dated.  Ok, maybe that's an exaggeration, but I would say probably 95% of the dudes I've dated decide they want to get back with me anything from weeks to months to years to decades after they dated me (see this post, bullet point #1 for an example).  Um...why?? I don't get it.  What is it that keeps them coming back? Why did they not realize when they were WITH me how awesome I am? (lol)  Why do they think it's OK for them to keep coming back?  So many questions. #mystery

Another question: Why am I bringing this up?  Well, at 9:25 PM I received a text message from a dude that I went on ONE date with like 2 months ago.  He said: "Well.  I'm assuming you didn't lose your phone twice!"

Ok, so no, obviously I didn't lose my phone.  And I feel for the kid, I really do, because this is totally a tactic that I would use if I wanted to hear from someone I haven't spoken to in a while.  But being on the receiving end of this one text in particular, it made me feel kinda bad -- like, obviously I don't want to be an asshole and not reply (my mom always taught me to be nice), but at the same time, I don't really want to chat with him or hang out with him, so I don't really feel like I should reply because it would end up being really annoying and innocuous back and forth which I know will lead nowhere.  And I honestly don't want to lead this dude on -- he's a super nice guy, very interesting, and very smart, but there was just no chemistry.  And I'm a sucker for going on chemistry (which is going to be a post soon, keep an eye out).

So what would y'all do in this situation -- would you write him back to be nice? Or risk more boomeranging by replying? #dilemma